Words of occasional wisdom from Bruce Oakley

Yes, dear

Posted by boakley59 on January 22, 2008

My wife, Suzy, is a good egg. She deserves more love and praise than a mere man like me can give, but perhaps I can tell you a little about how she saves me.

Bruzy wedding photoI probably wouldn’t even be alive if not for Suzy’s heroic support as I contend with chronic Crohn’s disease. At the onset of the disease in 1998, I was sick for a month before she made me see a doctor and get to the hospital. You might think passing blood would be a sufficient clue to the need for medical help, but perhaps my ignoring this clue sheds light on the concept of “a mere man.”

In the latest Crohn’s episode, swelling and pain in my butt have kept me couch-ridden since May 2007. For eight months now, I have not been able to sit or move about comfortably for longer than about 90 minutes at a time. After that, the stress of pain suppression wears me out. I’ll skip any more details, but the point is that Suzy has had to do the living for two for quite some time. She has to be the breadwinner, caregiver and housekeeper. I can do bits and pieces of bookkeeping and planning, but mostly I am Suzy’s chief cheerleader. I encourage you all to follow my lead: Who do we appreciate? Suzy!

But it’s Suzy’s latest gift to me that I want to offer thanks for today.

You might think that saving my life would be enough, but not being a mere man Suzy doesn’t stop at such trifles. Still, as you might expect, even a heroine can only do so much, and the load Suzy has been carrying has taken a toll. Her release (talking life out with a mere man doesn’t quite do the trick) has been to start a blog of her own, suzyandspice. Naturally, Suzy won’t do anything without excellence, and she has wanted to enhance her pages but wasn’t sure how to encode certain effects. Enter Bruce, the geek and former newspaper Web editor. She had been pressing me to start my own blog as I told her about the past several months of what I call “lessons learned as a lump” (more later in other posts). When she needed presentation help, it seemed a good time for me to start a blog with some test pages so I could figure out the code for those certain effects.

But I’m a writer and editor by training and trade, so once I had a blog account and some test pages, the wish to do more was overwhelming.

I love to write, but it’s been too long since I have done much of it. My earliest high school English teacher required us to keep a journal, and I stuck with it through college. In my early years out of college, I worked at small newspapers and for most of those first few years I wrote weekly columns. Then, I moved to bigger papers that already had plenty of columnists, and only the occasional long letter to old friends gave me much chance to write anything more than a headline. Sometimes I have a brief revival of my journal; sometimes I give a lecture; sometimes I write Suzy’s late father to let him know I’m still faithfully tending his treasure.

But now Ben Taylor’s treasure has helped me find a lost piece of myself and I am writing again. I hope I write wisely and well, with some simple fun tossed in from time to time. I hope you will enjoy it and will join me in thanking my love for all her help.

Suzy, can I help you with your blog coding? Do I know the greatness of the gifts you give? Do I love you?

Yes, dear!


2 Responses to “Yes, dear”

  1. Suzy said

    What a great blog! What great subject matter! Write more! About me! ILY. 🙂

  2. berit said

    you crazy kids! i can just feel the love radiate from the screen to warm my little cold hands! and yes, that sweet suzy is such a treasure!

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